My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize
