he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
