If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
