is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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