Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
