No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
