Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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