we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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