You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize