And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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