just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
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