She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
All the doctor said was why
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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