yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
