Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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