I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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