Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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