What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
