Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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