Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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