well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
