Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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