Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
