what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Randomize
