she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
