Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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