idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Say something about gay babies.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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