your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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