A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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