Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize