Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
