I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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