I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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