i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
