Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
