I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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