sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
