It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You made out with two different species that night
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
