I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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