no, he came in my armpit
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
