Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
