We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
