Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I want her autograph on my taint
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
