I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
