We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize