office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
