Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
