what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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