It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize