Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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