idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
